Monday, July 11, 2011

Conversations With Clyde

To say that Clyde is clever and precocious is vastly under-rating him. He and Bonnie are the two most clever and precocious beings I've encountered.

This morning, after a clattering eruption on my bedside table, I had the following conversation with Clyde:

Momma: "Clyde, where are Momma's glasses?"
Clyde: "I don't know Momma."
Momma: "Clyde, are you being a bad boy?"
Clyde: "No Momma. I would never be a bad boy."
A few frustrated minutes later...after I put the cell phone back together and located my glasses....
Momma: "Clyde, why are Momma's glasses underneath the bedside table?"
Clyde: "I don't know Momma."
Momma: "Clyde...."
Clyde: "Oh. Yes. Well you see Momma this is what happened...while you were sleeping the Monster Who Takes Momma's Glasses came in to your room. I was being a good boy and I smelled the monster and ran to stop him from taking Momma's glasses."
Momma: "Clyde...."
Clyde: "No really Momma...that's what happened. So when I saw the monster taking your glasses, I jumped on him and bit him in the neck....just like I do to Sister...only I would NEVER bite Sister as hard as I bit that monster. Well, the monster hollered and dropped your glasses. Then he fell off the bedside stand and I was still biting his neck. When we hit the floor, the monster dropped your glasses and kicked them under the bedside table. I chased the monster away."
Momma: "Really?"
Clyde: "Yes Momma, really. Then when the monster was all gone, I tried to get your glasses from under the bedside stand, but I'm just a little boy and I couldn't reach them."
Momma: "And so that's how Momma's glasses got under the bedside stand?"
Clyde: "Yes Momma. Aren't I a good boy?"

I decided not to pursue how the cell phone and charger came to be on the floor...

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